07:12:00
Guest Post by Arthur Igbolaju Richard
Just few days ago I was at the mechanic with a friend to fix the car, some how along the line a certain joke was made about tokunbo and we just laughed over it, then I remembered an encounter I had at Unilag last week.
I had gone to a shop to buy iphone charger, after agreeing price with the woman and about to pay, she said, ''brother, I hope you know se dis one no be the real one, na tokunbo better pass'' Mind you, she had previously shown me like 4 different types of chargers and I had selected the most expensive one with the hope that it was the main one.
One important thing I have learned in life is that most times, most powerful and serious words and comments are often made through jokes or something close to it.
Ever wondered why a country like Nigeria may never progress? Like seriously like real progress away from carrying begging plate to Abuja every month end to beg for federal allocation or something close to it. Nigeria is one country that so much love to leave on the yesterday. You hardly hear a typical Nigerian talk about the future, they always talk about the past.
An average Nigerian want to live a good life but will never want to go through the path of the future that will guaranttee good life. They want it now or yesterday, they so much love Egypt and everything in it that they are always willing to go back there.
A clear example is the Nigerian men. Gone are the days Nigerian men were excited to marry virgins. Infact if you are a young girl in Nigeria and you are still a virgin, sorry is your second name because you may soon find out that you may stay longer in your father's house than you think. Nigerian men these days prefers tested okay. I hope you understand what I mean by tested okay! Like seriously like what you and I understand by tested okay.
The only way a Nigerian guy and his mother and other family members can be assured that a prospective wife can bear children is through evidence that she has previously had one. She stands a better chance if she has had up to 4, and heaven be praised if the 4 or probably 3 were boys, that is direct pass or entry as the case may be.
That is more reason you see most guys these days marry tokunbo wives, get tokunbo girl friends and all that. Nigeria is now in tokunbo age and everything about Nigeria is tokunbo.
An average Nigerian will always give you a very good excuss why he prefers tokunbo to new one. Ones excuss will even gain more legitimacy if he is a broom carrying Nigerian.
Watch out, when ever Nigerians want to go back to tokunbo, you will see people like Wole Soyinka speak some big big grammar that some of us do not understand. You will see people like Tunde Bakare jump out with the Bible and lie against God just to justify the journey to the city of tokunbo, then Femi Falana will authomatically forget about human right and rule of law (a wonderful elder statesman indeed), (may my home state, Anambra never have his kind of elder stateman). Then other vuvuzelas and broom carrying demons.
And here we are today, just like most Nigerian men with tokunbo wives and girl friends, tokunbo children, tokunbo plane, tokunbo pot, plate and spoons, tokunbo cars, tokunbo houses, tokunbo shoe and clothes and all that, we now have a tokunbo president who first came to power the exact year I was born, we now have tokunbo government officials everywhere, we will soon find out that Kogi and Bayelsa will likely have tokunbo governors, then tokunbo ministers. Remember people like Pat Utomi and co are in that list. I remember very well that Pat Utomi was in government before I was born in the 80s. Learnt the new custom's boss is a tokunbo, sorry, a retired soldier. So also the new DSS boss.
Even as I type with my laptop, something tells me that somebody may soon ask Nigerians to go back to typewriter as part of the change they promised us.
Welcome to tokunbo Nigeria.
Wait a minute! I'm not through yet, somebody should please tell our tokunbo president that the economy is really biting hard on the masses.
Thank You.
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